Whose Line is It Anyways? Narutostyle
by xblahxxblahx
Summary: Four competitors fight in the battle of improvisation, comedy, and just plain retardation!Naruto, Jiraiya, Sakura, and Choji!
1. oNe

**Whose line is it anyway? Naruto-style **

Host: Welcome to Whose Line is it Anyway! Naruto-style!

_Audience claps _

Host: Here we have our four contestants! Uzumaki Naruto!

Naruto_ stands up and bows_: Thank you for having me!

Hinata_ in the audience_: Yeah! Go Naruto! _She throws flowers at him_: For you Naru!

_One of them hits the host_

Host: Augh!

_He looks at her_: Get out….

Hinata_ looks around_: What?! Me?!

Host: Security! Take her outside!

_Two buff guys come out opposite doors_: Get her!

Hinata _sticks her hand on her butt_: You'll never get me suckas! Hahahahaha! _She runs out of the door. The security guards chase her. _

Host, _doesn't give a damn_: Anyways, back to the show…..We have Haruno Sakura!

_Sakura curtsies, the men whistle._

Sakura: Hey! You fucking pedophiles! _She flips them off_ You want to look at me? Well kiss my Asian ass! _She turns around and pulls her pants off_

_Host stops drooling_: Hey! Save that for the show!

Host: Ay, me…_sighs_ Next, we have, I don't know his last name, but Jiraya!

_Jiraya smiles, then looks at Sakura sheepishly_

Jiraya: Hey Sakura baby. You can show me your ass any day!

Inner Sakura: Dead piece of shit!

_Sakura lunges at Jiraya_

Audience members: Fight! Fight! Fight!

Host: We are experiencing some technical difficulties. _Looks at Sakura and Jiraya, Sakura choking Jiraya._ Uh, here's a word from our sponsor!

Commercial, Sasuke pops up.

Sasuke: Hello friends, having pedophile troubles? I know I do. I am tired of being chased by some creepy guy. Such as this.

_He points to something not on camera._

Sasuke: Hey! Release the pedophile!

Orochimaru _comes running_: Oh Sasuke boy! Come to daddy!

Sasuke _dodges Orochimaru_: for bothering pedophiles, use our new patented Pedo-Gone!

_He takes out a can shaped like a mace bottle. He sprays it on Orochimaru's face_.

Sasuke: Spray it like so…

Orochimaru: I'm melting! I'm melting! _A pool of liquid is surrounding him. _

Sasuke: And your pedophile is gone!

Announcer: Pedo-Gone will not work on all pedophiles, and will not work on perverts. Side-effects are mutation, scarier pedophiles, head lice, diarrhea, and canker sores if sprayed in mouth. You may not use Pedo-Gone if you are pregnant, handicapped, or if you have hemorrhoids. Not suitable under the age of 10.

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Thank you for reading, I'll continue as soon as I am done with my essay TT. Sorry, but I need at least 4 reviews before I continue writing (not from the same person, please) Sorry! XD

I promise the next chapter (if there will be one...sweats) will be much longer, and funnier. For now, I am just testing to see if this is good enough.


	2. tWo

Host: We are back with **Whose Line is it Anyways? NarutoStyle!** Due to technical difficulties, we weren't able to introduce our last contestant!

Hinata _in the distance_: You'll never catch me now, bitches!

Host _directs security towards her_: Catch her damn it! _Looks to the audience_ Sorry…..on with the show! As I was saying, our last contestant is……Akimichi Choji!

Choji: Thank you for having me! _Looks at Host._ Can I have a bag of chips?

Host: Uh…uh….I guess, I don't see anything wrong with that…_talks into his microphone_ Can we get Choji some chips?

Stage crew _comes out with bag of chips_: Here you go, Mr. Akimichi

Choji: Thanks _starts eating the chips_

Host: Now, back with the show-

Choji: Mr. Host?

Host, _irritated_: Yes, Choji?

Choji: Can I have another bag of chips?

Host: No, now shut up, or I'll slit your throat. Any objections, anyone?

Naruto, Sakura, Jiraiya: No, we're good

_Choji whimpers_

Host: Finally….now back to the show

(( The seating order is Naruto on the far left, Jiraiya to the right of him, then Choji, and Sakura on the far right.))

Host: Okay, contestants, the first game we have is-

Sakura: AAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUGH!

Host _and audience look at Sakura_: What's wrong, Sakura?

Sakura: Choji is eating my fingers!!!! _Everyone looks at Choji with Sakura's hand in her mouth_

Choji: It's not my fault! _He continues to lick Sakura's fingers_ They taste like pineapples! I love pineapples!

Host: Someone get him some food!

_Men come out with a plate of meat_

Host: sighs we will be back….after the break…._to himself_ Stupid ass Choji…

Commercial

Sasuke: Are you pissed that when your teacher makes you get the bells from his side pockets? Well we have a solution! With this!

_Takes out a .44 Magnum_

This is what we call the .44Magnumusedtoshootyourdamnteacherformakingyoudothisstupidexercise

This .44Magnumusedtoshootyourdamnteacherformakingyoudothisstupidexercise follows the sound of bells, no matter what note it plays. For example: _points to someone off camera_ Release the teacher.

Kakashi _pops up_: Hey Sasuke! Think you can get my bells? _Takes out Make-Out Paradise_

Sasuke _pulls out gun_: I don't think, I know.

BAM! _Kakashi is dead, Sasuke walks up to him_.

Sasuke: Who has your damn bells now, MOFO?!

Warning: This stunt was tested by experts, side effects are the user will be hunt down and killed for the murder of their teacher. .44Magnumusedtoshootyourdamnteacherformakingyoudothisstupidexercise will not work against Sound Ninja, or if you are at a church with multiple bells, you may not use this item if: You have herpes, carrying a baby, have AIDS, or if you have constipation.


	3. tHrEe

Host: Finally…….sighs we can get back to our show…

Audience: _Applauds _

Host: Now, to introduce our band members….first, there's Shikamaru Nara with the bass guitar!

Shikamaru: Judging from the size of the guitar and the maximum strings on this, I can probably play-

Host: Shut the fuck up you stupid four eyes!

Shikamaru, _scared_: B-b-b-but I'm not wearing glasse-

Host, _furious_: I SAID SHUT THE FUCK UP SO I CAN GET TO THE NEXT FUCKING PERSON!!

_Shikamaru is in a corner, rocking back and forth_: Scared……scar-r-r-red

Host _is calm_: Next, we have Aburame Shino on the piano!

Shino: Thanks! _Puts his hands behind his hands Music is playing _ Look ma! No hands!

Host: Da fuck? _Tells cameraman to zoom into the piano, sees bugs jumping up and down_

That's it, you're fired _Looks to security_ Get him off stage

Shino: B-b-but the bugs don't play if I don't tell them to……..

Host: Not if I pay them10 nickels for each song…_takes out a nickel_ You like-y the shiny??

Bugs, _excited_: Bee-dee-bee-dee-buh-doh!

Shino _is being dragged off stage_: I will be back! You can't get rid of me so easily!

Host: Shino? The 80s called. They want their shades back!

Host: We will be back, after the break…..and hopefully….start the show….

Commercial: _Jiraiya pops up_

Jiraiya: Hey lads and……..lads!

Announcer: Must be over the age of 15 to view this commercial

Jiraiya: Are you reaching that period of time when all you can think about is sex? Well that happens to me also, for the past 35 years of my life! But now, I have invented a new item used to help you during this period of curiosity! With this! The Boob-Magnificationer! _Takes out a telescope_ My friends want to call it a telescope, but that is the most retarded name I have ever heard of! The Boob-Magnificationer first started as a toilet paper roll! But then I borrowed Shino's shades to increase the power! Along with some of my own personal chakra, I made the Boob-Magnificationer! It can zoom into anything! But mostly used for our own pervertious reasons! For example!

_Takes out the Boob-Magnificationer and adjusts it and positions it into a hole_

Jiraiya: And you look into it like so…….._puts his eyes in it_ drools

Girl #1: Hey everybody! _Jiraiya jerks_ We have a peeking Tom over here!

Girl #2: That pervert! _Covers herself up_

Girl #3: Let's jump him!

All girls chase Jiraiya

Jiraiya: I wasn't looking at you! I-I-I-I was just checking to see if you had anything wrong with you..

Girl #3: So you think we're deformed??

Jiraiya: N-n-n-no….

Girl #3: Aww hell, Let's jump his fucking ass for getting all up in our grille! Cuz that's how we roll!

Jiraiya runs off in the distance

Boob-Magnificationer has other uses such as: Stalking your lover, looking at the stars, blinding someone, whacking a molester, and using it as a pipe to smoke drugs.

No side-effects, so far……may get receive narrow eyes for staring so long.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The The show actually starts next chapter! blame the retarded Naruto characters for being douches

Yay so far everyone likes these, so I will keep writing, with other episodes such as

Whose Line is it Anyway? Narutostyle with the bad guys!!

Orochimaru, Itachi, Sasuke ((for the moment)), and Kabuto!


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